


dead and gone and passed tonight

by jkriscancelledyeet



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: F/M, Female Tony Stark, Natasha Romanov Is a Good Bro, Natasha isn't the only dancer on the team, Protective Avengers, Protective Bucky Barnes, Protective Steve Rogers, Toni is a Badass, Toni wasn't always rich, Tony Stark Gets a Hug, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony Stark Is a Good Bro, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, but shh it's a secret, so is toni
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-28
Updated: 2020-06-28
Packaged: 2021-03-03 19:28:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,214
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24970819
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jkriscancelledyeet/pseuds/jkriscancelledyeet
Summary: “Well, I think if he was here, he’d be proud of Iron-Man. Of what you’ve become."“He’s not here,” Toni says without a beat.There’s a pause. “No, no he’s not.”(Once upon a time, Antonia Stark had a best friend. Unlike Cap— she couldn’t get her’s back.)OR,Toni’s story.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers/Tony Stark, Natasha Romanov & Tony Stark, Tony Stark & Avengers Team
Comments: 6
Kudos: 110





	dead and gone and passed tonight

**Author's Note:**

> few notes before you read:  
> \- toni is younger, around 26 in this  
> \- set post civil-war
> 
> yeah, that's about it, hope you enjoy!

Post ‘Civil-War’, as the media had dubbed it, was awkward, to say the least. Under a new and improved version of the Accords, the Rogues had moved back and everyone pretended that nothing had happened. Toni found it quite annoying. They moved back into _her_ tower and pretended everything was alright. She didn't know whether to be relieved or angry, honestly.

The media seem to hate her. 

She saw the articles—  _ Why The Avengers Should Drop Iron-Man _ , or  _ Iron-Man, Do We Need Her? _ — and as much as they hurt, ignored them.

She wasn’t Iron-Man for the world. 

She was Iron-Man for him.

Nobody needed to know that, though.

* * *

The rogues spend most of their time scowling at her.

She scowls back at them.

_ Who needs them anyway?  _

Barton and Wilson and Maximoff haven’t talked to her once since they’d been pardoned— haven’t tried too, even two months later, and Romanoff and Barnes and Rogers seem to be trying to stay away from getting in her way.

They watch her, though. Inspect her. Try to piece together the puzzle she is.

She can feel their gazes on her back.

* * *

Fury gives them fewer team missions. She rarely goes out to fight with them, rarely even has a proper time to be Iron-Man.

Barton and Romanoff are always gone on undercover duties, and Barnes soon joined in on the fun.

The ‘Rogues’ go on missions together, leaving her at the tower for days at a time.

It hurts.

She ignores it.

_ The quiet is nice. _

* * *

She spends most of her time in her lab or the gym, alone. Though she’s never told the team, Nata— Romanoff isn’t the only one with a background in dance.

When the ‘Rogue’s’ are gone on missions, she lets down her hair and jumps and spins around the common room and gym and lab and everywhere.

When they’re gone, she belts at the top of her lungs and pretends she’s singing in a concert.

And when they come back, the smile drops, the freedom dissipates, and she goes back to lab, back to work.

It’s a cycle.

* * *

Slowly, Romanoff becomes Natasha again. The spy starts checking in on her, makes small talk. It’s more forced— more awkward than it’d been before, but she appreciates the effort.

They mend their relationship, steadily. (She ignores Barton’s glares when Natasha talks to her.) 

Toni is still alone, though. She’ll never have what the others have, the sense of team and family. She’ll never have it, and she doesn’t care anyway.

She lost that feeling with him, anyway.

* * *

Toni was six, she thinks, when she met her best friend for the first time. He was at the same boarding school her dad had sent her too, and they had become fast friends. Another rich kid going to a rich private school. The place had academics, then a sport or skill you focused on and became good at.

She had chosen Mixed Arts as her’s. A perfect combination of dance, singing, and theatre. She’d wanted to go to Broadway, someday. To stand on a stage. To sing and become characters. 

Four days later, he came into her dorm smiling. He’d picked Cross Country. So Antonia— as she always did— went to the school administration and begged them to let her do two extra classes. 

They relented. She was Antonia Stark, after all. 

He used to practice lines with her, and she’d run with him.

An unlikely pair.

The other kids laughed at them— teased them about ‘dating’ each other, about ‘cooties’ and ‘a boy and a girl being best friends’, but she hadn’t given a rat’s ass. 

Still didn’t.

* * *

_ “I went to the doctor’s yesterday, Tonia. They said I have iron deficiency.” _

_ Fourteen-year-old Toni had merely snorted. _

_ He shoved her off the bed as they both burst into giggles. _

It’s her eighth favorite memory in the whole wide world. 

Eighth.

It’s also the reason Toni chose Iron-Man instead of Steel-Man or Metal-Man, but whatever, that’s irrelevant anyway.

* * *

“Who will live to tell your story?” She asks the sky one night. The stars are bright. “If I die.”

It’s a line quoted from her favorite musical in the world, the one they used to blast together, the first one she’d ever auditioned for in her school.

The question is left unanswered.

It hurts, but she’s used to it.

* * *

  
  


As Romanoff becomes Natasha, Barnes and Rogers become James and Steve.

They hang out with her, sometimes. In the lab.

The company gives her a warm fuzzy feeling, but she shakes it away. She won't get attached again, not after what happened with Ste- Rogers.

James gives her his arm, sometimes, to work on. They sit in silence.

Sometimes it is welcome, other times it is suffocating.

* * *

One night, after deciding to go out for dinner together (Stark has been invited but declined), the Avengers walk into the common room to a still Toni. She is sitting on the floor, eyes closed. It looks like she’s meditating, but Sam stubs his toe against the couch and curses, and her eyes open. 

They see tears, for the first time. Seeing Antonia Stark cry is not a common occurrence at all, and most of them have never witnessed it.

She bites down on her lips, choking down a sob, and leaves the room in the hurry.

Sharon looks away. She'd been hanging out with them more often, and they enjoyed her company.

“Antonia had a best fri-- brother,” she says, voice blunt and informative. There's a pang to her eyes, as she remembers the person. “Today was...” her voice wavers. “Today is a special day.”

“Hold up,” Clint says, “A brother?”

Natasha frowns. “Even I didn’t know that.”

Sharon narrows her eyes, turning protective. "Don't bring him up, and I'm serious about that."

It raises a new question for everyone. They really didn’t know anything about Ironman’s past.

* * *

Toni does not come out of the lab for four days straight and doesn’t let anyone in. 

When she does, she’s wearing black leggings and a black hoodie. Her hair is in a bun, and there’s a bit of makeup on her face. 

Grabbing a bar from the cabinet at breakfast, surprising them all, she looks back at them once. “I’ll be back before the month ends.”

It’s the fourth of April.

* * *

She’s gone for nearly three weeks. 

(When she comes back, her hands are wrapped in bandages and she doesn’t talk about where she’s gone or been.)

She comes back, and it is normal again.

* * *

Life goes on. 

Natasha and James and Steve and even Sam have started to truly become her friends.

Wanda is cautious but curious. She and Toni are the closest in age, and they find themselves joking around with each other sometimes.

Clint and Toni don’t talk— at all, and none of the two feels the need to.

* * *

And just as it looks up, as things start to get better, it crumbles back down in a moment.

One fine evening, there’s a random man sitting in the kitchen. 

The Avengers in the room draw their weapons, their guards coming up. Steve opens his mouth to question him, and— 

Toni walks in a second later and freezes completely.

“Antonia,” the man whispers, half-relieved and half-anxious. “Long time no see.”

**Author's Note:**

> hope you liked the first part, leave a comment or kudo because those make me happy!
> 
> also this is just the beginning of the large puzzle im making Toni, stay tuned for more ;)


End file.
